The Different Types Of Relationships You Can Have

Beware...some of these may be more familiar to you than you are ready to accept....

The Glamour Couple

The glamour couple is usually a coming together of two huge egos, often they are both beautiful people with gorgeous features and are the envy of many a relationship seeker. However beneath the surface things can be very shallow, ostentatious and they spend more time thinking about how they are viewed in the public eye than they do about what goes on within the relationship. Although if cemented at a young age the couple can maintain a successful stable popular relationship. This can go one of two ways however...think Posh and Becks versus Jordan and Peter Andre (or Dwight Yorke, or Alex Reid or.....)

Noticeable Quirks - Seen regularly at award shows, red carpet galas, standing around looking good in various high profile places.

The Online Relationship

The modern age has seen modern forms of relationships begin to pop up with some folk delving into online relationships...some even more so than they are aware. With everything from porn being easier to access, chat rooms, dating sites and more recent mobile apps like tinder and snapchat readily available many people can hide behind the keyboard and have guilt free relationships and experiences, whether that be 'one night chats' or meeting someone on a dating website.....we say do whatever floats your boat. However  if you're the other partner, or cyber one night stand or online dating person don't expect in all cases the person to be exactly what it says on the cyber tin...everything from whether whoever on the other end of the chat window is genuine to their gender should be question. That sexy sounding Susan2167 might, outside the virtual world be know by the first name of Steven...don't say you haven't been warned.

Noticeable Quirks - Typing 60 words a minute, sugar coating sugar coated white lies...Photoshop 101 for all those images that need a "touch up".

The One Way Relationship

Someone is this relationship is completely dependent on the other...the other of course could happily walk away and be secure and successful but for some reason (probably because they're content) they choose not to. Insecurities ensue to the shape of the dependent always being in fear of losing the other half. The reality is that the successful one is more than happy to be in the current relationship, as alluded to above, because they see their partner as (insecurities aside) bringing out the best in them. The non dependent partner will more than likely not be in any way shallow or driven by material possessions, the dependent side however...

Noticeable Quirks - Fighting over not doing things together, or when one person needs to do something on their own, should we mention the elements of golddiggin'? No? OK..we won't even go near the fact that these relationships can be a haven for breeding stalkers so...

This Is The Relationship That Never Ends

...it just goes on and on my friend

It's that relationship that you recognise when you see that young couple who you just know will become like your grandparents whom have been together for close to a hundred years....except you grandparents are happy. When they sit there in silence not talking to each other you just know that they have a mental understanding with each other. Modern day couples in the relationship that never ends though are much different. It will probably be on and off like a (cliche alert!) light switch but they will always go back to each other because they are scared of life apart. They have built their fort and are not interested in swimming the crocodile infested waters to get out of it.

Noticeable Quirks - Sitting in silence, eating in silence, listening to Simon and Garfunkel's The Sound of Silence...

 

The Intense Relationship

We all know this one, whether its through a friend or having been through it ourselves. The relationship which starts with a flurry of lovey dovey-ness, the words "I love you" are generally uttered after about an average of 7 seconds. A honeymoon period that exists only between two people, cutting everyone else off from around them and being oblivious to anyone else warning. Unfortunately this kind of thing doesn't last long and what starts with boredom towards the things that used to excite usually ends with a reenactment of Pearl Harbour.....and we ain't talking bout the soppy love story with Ben Affleck..we mean the full on attack with specially modified B-25 Mitchell bombers by the Japanese on the 7th December 1941.

Noticeable quirks - Eating the faces of each other on public transport (yes!!...those people) Joined at the hip, fighting when one suggests doing something without the other i.e "What do you mean I can't play 5-a-side with you an your mates..."

The OMG Relationship

Two people so left and right of centre that one has to ask what the hell are they doing together.. For example putting a law student and a dropout music student together. Or your best mate that has decided he's not just hooking up with a 40 something year old, but they've decided they're going to make things official. They will cause blank stares wherever they go and just plain confusion amongst friends. The relationship will make no sense to those onlooking as they will know the mate in this type of relationship to be of a similar way of life to them, therefore not being able to comprehend the interest in such a person. The OMG relationship baffles the mind...

Noticeable Quirks - One of them will always seem out of place, rarely seen with each other friends, incessant arguing over politics (if one of them cares enough)

The Abusive Relationship

The signs here don't have to be bruising or black eyes. Emotional bullying is as abusive and can lead to deeper scars. This is the one relationship on the list that we will not be adapting a slight bit of humour towards as it's serious and if you recognise signs in any of your mates, be they male or female they will need your help asap.

If you feel your friend or even yourself are in a position like this then dig a little deeper on the info. It can be hard to distinguish whether someone is in an abusive emotional relationship or whether they are actually happy, as people in abusive relationships often try to maintain an "everything is great" on the surface approach.

Noticeable Quirks - Some of the signs include quick involvement, jealousy, controlling, high expectations, isolation (of family and friends), laying the blame elsewhere..ie. "you make me so mad" rather than "I am so mad"

The Perfect Couple

They contain the best of all the other relationships listed and are generally a fusion of the giver and the nice guy listed in our partner specials. They make people sick with their happiness, but they don't care, they don't have to, they have everything going for them and they should be duly happy with themselves. They never have urges in a sexual way towards other beings as they fulfill each others every need. They are a perfect match for each other in every way..yes sireee the more I talk about this type of couple the more I want to shoot myself. They don't need my blessing...and you know who they are...they're that couple you want to be.

Noticeable Quirks - Doing the right thing, being generally brilliant.... they love holding hands and giving their offspring the confidence to do whatever they want.

 

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