8 Things a Guy Should Never Say To A Girl

I've gotten a few slaps across the face in my time, and if you keep up with the nature of my posts some of you may understand why. I tend to lean a bit towards the sexual side and am fairly decisive in my opinions on certain subjects, hence the few slaps, mostly from twenty something females....here's what I've learned not to say on my travels, even if I have slightly over exaggerated them for the sake of humour. Hardy harr harr. Here's 8 things a guy should never say to a girl.

1. “You're wearing too much make up”

An ex of mine went borderline psycho killer when I happened to utter the words, "you're nearly more make up than person". Perhaps not the best choice of words but in calling a spade a spade, it was true. She resembled one of the stepford wives and I was always concious of the fact that she looked borderline drag queen, and that's coming from a guy who is generally not embarrassed easily or overtly shallow. As you can guess, it didn't last too long.

2. "You're pretty clever...for a girl"

I've never said this myself but reckon the fall out would be catastrophic. Possibly the most patronising thing you could ever say to anyone really and you deserve a good slap. You'll more than likely get one too.

3. The answer “Yes” to the old 'Chinese trap' question "does my bum look big in this" ...

Never, ever, ever over the course of your life fall for this humdinger. It is the question that will uproot the mother of all arguments. Her bum is lovely you hear, lovely...repeat after me "no honey, it's perfect".

4. "Girls have it easier"

Whether it's presuming females have it easier based on a) looks, be it interviews or situations whereby fluttering their eyelashes will get them out of a sticky situation by taking advantage of the reaction of red blooded males or b) whether you just think that they show a little bit of playfulness to get what they want....you'd be wrong. Only some girls do that.

5. “Yeah, you could do with losing a few pounds"

Generally in response to the "do you think I'm fat" question...this is the evil step sister of "does my bum look big in this?" covered in number 3...so yeah, obviously, don't take the bait.

6. “You should talk about sex more”

By my nature I don't shy away from sexual conversation and feel everyone should follow suit, being of the opinion that sexual conversation was smothered in this country for years by the powers that were and we are now only truly finding that by being more open we can experience much more comfortable sexual experiences. However, that's just my humble opinion and I have learned that this stance does make people feel uncomfortable. I would never force my opinion on anyone so I reckon that dropping a "you should talk about sex more" line wouldn't be as welcome in all situations.