We've all cried real Jesus tears doing our makeup. They make it look so easy in the tutorials, but you always end up looking like a tanned raccoon. What even is contouring anyway? And how do you do it? All I want in life is perfect winged eyeliner. Is that too much to ask? Here's the 12 mishaps we've all had when it comes to makeup.
1) The first time you put eyeliner on.
It burns, dear fucking God it burns! How do people do this? Never again.
2) Putting way too much blusher on.
G-R-E-A-T. Now I look like an embarrassed Barbie.
3) Your foundation is too dark for your neck.
Advertisement
Why is it so hard to get a tan on your bloody neck?!
4) Trying to do winged eyeliner.
How do those fucking bitches do this?! I'm not jealous at all.
5) Getting eyelash glue in your eye.
"It'll be fun", they said. "You'll look great", they said. I'm blind now, you said.
Advertisement
6) Wanting to look like Taylor Swift with red lipstick.
I can't even colour inside the lines. How am I going to be able to do it with my face?
7) When you sneeze after doing your mascara and your eyes stick together.
My whole face is ruined.
Advertisement
8) Attempting an eyeshadow tutorial.
I look like the fucking Winter Soldier.
9) When you try to do your other eye and rub mascara on your nose.
Thank you the Universe. This is the exact look I was going for.
10) When you drop your bronzer.
Advertisement
It's broken into tiny little pieces, much like my life.
11) Touching anything before washing your hands.
Yes, precisely how I wanted to decorate my room. Streaky makeup hands all over the walls.
12) Forgetting to brush your teeth beforehand and having to be really careful not to get toothpaste everywhere.
Cause white foam is such a good look.
