The 10 People You See In The Library Before Exams

This time of yeah just comes around so fucking fast, doesn't it?! Like, one minutes it Fresher's Week and you blink and then it's Christmas and now, here we are with a whole years worth of study to catch up on. Sitting in the library. More than likely hungover to fuck and staring at a page full of words that we just can't make sense of/couldn't give less of a shit about. To top it all off, the library is a hotbed of arseholes. Here are the top 10.

1. The person who has had WAY too much coffee

I can judge you just by the amount of empty Starbucks cups surrounding you… and I’m praying that you haven’t had more than that.

2. The couple that are on a ‘date’

There is a fucking couple who I DESPISE that sit around on the couches in the middle of fucking campus eating each others faces 24/7. Please FUCK OFF. Can you tell they piss me off, no? Keep your PDA away from me…but dear Christ, in the confined space of the library? Just no.

3. The person who’s not in it for the long haul

Their jacket is still on and they're sitting at an empty table scrolling through their phone. I get it; you have half an hour between classes and didn’t know where to go, but when I can’t find a place to study and you’re hogging a full table to yourself, you better fucking move.

4. The person watching Netflix

Like, who exactly are you trying to kid, pal?

5. The person who looks way too put together and glamourous to be in the library

Your cute Pinterest hair style, dress and heels are making me feel bad for using dry shampoo three days in a row and wearing sweatpants, so please leave.

6. The person who really needs a shower

After circling the library for fifteen minutes trying to find a spot, I got so excited when there were six surrounding you. Then I realized it was because your stench was making it hard to breath - never mind study. I get that we're all stressed because we got pissed instead of go to class all year but dude, seriously. Even I managed to spray on some deodorant.

7. The person who keeps asking you to watch their stuff

I’m not even responsible enough to make sure I eat something that isn't pizza, never mind guard your new laptop, overpriced textbooks, wallet and expensive coat in a room full of strangers.

8. The person who hasn’t studied at all

I’m not one to judge (at least usually), but let's be honest, the only thing I’ve seen open on your computer is Facebook, and your document only has a title so far. Have fun with your repeats.

9. The person looking to get a date

Currently, the only ‘number’ I care about are the ones in my stats assignment. I don’t know why you ever thought it would be a good idea to find your next bae in the area with the highest concentration of stressed, focused and overtired people.

10. The person who wants your computer charger, phone, pencil…

The number one rule of the library: always come prepared. It's the survival of the fittest, and I don’t care if my laptop’s at 100%, I’m going to be here longer than you anyway.

11. The person crying

Not to be insensitive, because I know college can be tough, but do you mind going somewhere else and doing that?

12. The people talking

Honestly, you could be talking about the cure for global warming right now, but the only thing I’m focused on is trying to understand what the fuck I'm writing in this essay. Can you leave and finish your conversation in a Starbucks?

15. The person on CollegeTimes

Procrastinating the right way - I like it.

Video: The 7 People You Meet Before an Exam

Credit: Kate Johnson

If YOU'D like to be part of the College Times writing team, please click here and fill out the form - we'd love to hear from you!

We care about your privacy