Will Power, Cravings and Pizza: Struggles Faced By Every Female On A Diet.
I think it's fair to say that most females have tried some description of a fad diet or 'healthy eating buzz' at some point in their lives. With the media constantly shovelling unrealistic images of beautiful women down our throats, it's hard not to feel totally body confident, which leads to us trying any method of weight loss that might help to shift those last few pounds.
1) I am such a wobbly mess. Seriously I need to shift this weight. My chins have chins for f*ck sake.
2) Okay, I'm ready to do this. MISSION SKINNY IS ON. I've seen this thing online that says if you drink 4 litres of cabbage juice a day you're guaranteed to lose 6 pounds in 6 days. Sounds healthy!
3) Jeeeeesus, cabbage juice is the most disgusting thing that has ever passed my lips.
4) Right, something new. I heard Beyonce does this mad cayenne pepper water diet thing. I wonder what that's like.
5) Okay, NOPE. I think maybe I should just stick to eating proper food, like salad and chicken breasts.
6) Fridge is full of lettuce, peppers, onions, fish and protein rich weight loss foods. I CAN ACTUALLY DO THIS.
7) This isn't so bad, maybe I could get used to this healthy eating malarky. It's a little bit bland but my palette will adjust soon enough.
8) Day three. Am I skinny yet?
9) I feel a bit lighter, these jeans are definitely more loose fitting. I think this diet business is kind of worth it.
10) UGH! IS THAT CAKE? Did someone actually cake into the office?
11) I have avoided the cake, WILLPOWER OF FUCKING STEEL I TELL YA!
12) The girls want to go for drinks, what's the lowest calorie option?
13) 'Skinny Bitch' it is. Vodka, soda water, and lime for dayyysssss!
14) Aghhhhhh, the hangover from drinking just drinking vodka, what's a healthy option for curing hangovers? is there one? Is there such thing?
15) No. No there's not. LEAVES AND CHICKEN FOR DINNER IT IS .. AGAIN.
16) Omg, there's a special offer online for a large pizza, garlic bread and chicken nuggets!!! Resistance is futile at this stage!
17) Ummmm, hello? Can I make an order for delivery, please?
18) I am about to enter into a carb-induced coma.
19) Well, I've ruined it .. Guess I'll have to start the diet again on Monday.
20) Oh, today is Monday? Fuck.... I'll start again next week!