Trinity College Dublin Looking To Spend €170,000 On Wine
An historic college renowned for its oft-lavish spending; a decadent sum of money to be spent on a vast quantity of wine - Oh Trinity College, how true to yourself you always are.
Trinity College Dublin - which has the highest proportion of people ironically wearing non-prescription glasses and smoking rollies per square metre in the entire country - have announced that they are looking for takers on a two-year contract, valued at roughly €170,000, to supply wines to the university, specifically their catering department.
They are looking for, the profoundly specific amount of, at least 8,466 bottles of wine to be supplied at this cost by a distributor. The wines are being purchased by the catering department and will primarily be used for private events. A spokesperson, speaking to The Irish Times, said that most of the clients who use Trinity's catering department are external and are "availing of catering and banqueting services provided through the dining hall or other hired venues on campus." Trinity College Dublin also utilises the facilities of its catering department, as many of the individual departments within the college will host functions, with the spokesperson saying, “In such cases the specific department is billed for the purchase of beverages.”
The cost of the wines however will not be absorbed by the university itself - save individual departments or the university actually making use of them during specific events - as private clients who book functions through the catering department will be invoiced the cost of whatever wine they consume.
"8,644, bottles of wine, is indeed a staggering amount," you may be saying, "certainly enough to tide me through, and take the edges off, a few rough mornings in the office at least, but what I would really like to have, at this point in the article, is a more comprehensive breakdown of exactly what types of wine we are talking about here." Well, dear reader, you are absolutely in luck as that is the precise situation we're about to find ourselves in.
The catering department are looking to line their wine-cellar/wine-racks/wine-cupboards/boot of a Ford Fiesta - I am not privy to what their preferred methods of wine-storage is - with some 2,940 bottles of house red, 2,930 bottles of house white. They're also looking to get their paws on 360 bottles of Prosecco, 444 bottles of Merlot, not to mention 624 bottles of SaBla - or Sauvignon Blanc to those of you not privy to what this awful abbreviation I have just coined stands for.
They are also looking for some particularly fancy wines, presumably to appeal to haughtier clients planning more highfalutin' events - I'm thinking perhaps a Christmas Party for the Department of Agriculture, or, specifically the afters drinks Eddie Hobbs would organise for the baptism of his latest newborn.
The estimated value of the contract - the €170,000 - could fall short of or exceed this figure depending on how much is used over the course of the two-year.