The 71 Best Would You Rather Questions

'Would you rather' is an excellent way of determining the weirdness that is your actual self. Because you can run from 'would you rather', but believe me, you can't hide....

1. Would you rather have finger sized nipples or nipple sized fingers?

2. Would you rather eat chocolate flavoured shit or shit-flavoured chocolate?

3. Would you rather shit on someone or have someone shit on you?

4. Would you rather have sex with a hideously, ugly person or a beautiful, fresh corpse?

5. Would you rather go bright purple when embarrassed or sweat so much you soak your clothes?

6. Would you rather fart every time you laugh or burp every time you cry?

7. Would you rather eat your family pet or kill your parents?

8. Would you rather have sex with someone with really bad BO or really bad breath?

9. Would you rather see your other half in a porn video or your parents?

10. Would you rather cheat and be caught or be cheated on and never be told?

11. Would you rather wear someone else's dirty underwear or use their toothbrush?

12. Would you rather have a 1-minute conversation with your past self or your future self?

13. If you could reincarnate yourself, would you rather come back as a human or an animal?

14. Would you rather not have sex for a year or have it every day of your life but not orgasm ever?

15. Would you rather be constantly itchy or constantly sticky?

16. Would you rather spend the day wearing wet socks or spend the day with a popcorn kernel stuck in your teeth?

17. Would you rather drink two litres of piss or two litres of sweat?

18. Would you rather lick someone's armpit or have someone else lick your armpit?

19. Would you rather have a ten-inch long belly button that swayed to music or accordions for legs?

20. Would you rather be constantly naked or always have people watch you have sex?

21. Would you rather be just friends with someone you love or marry someone you hate?

22. Would you rather be born with an elephant trunk or a giraffe neck?

23. Would you rather never leave the country or leave and never come back?

24. Would you rather eat poison ivy or a handful of wasps?

25. Would you rather be stranded on an island alone or with the person you hate the most?

26. Would you rather crap yourself once a year in public or every day in private?

27. Would you rather have vaginas in your armpits or an armpit between your legs?

28. Would you rather have a bell go off every time you're horny or never get horny?

29. Would you rather be the recipient of a bukkake party or throw a bukkake party?

30. Would you rather drown or burn to death?

31. Would you rather fulfil your biggest wish or resolve your biggest regret?

32. Would you rather drink a cup of your mum's period blood or your dad's sperm?

33. Would you rather be a superhero or a wizard?

34. Would you rather be a feminine man or a masculine woman?

35. Would you rather have an STI and never pass it on or have everyone think you have an STI?

36. Would you rather give birth pain-free through your mouth or painfully through your vagina?

37. Would you rather know what your pets think of you or never hear them speak?

38. Would you rather be incredibly beautiful and incredibly stupid or very ugly and super intelligent?

39. Would you rather shout all the time or whisper all the time?

40. Would you rather be a tree that can feel pain or a snail that would never die?

41. Would you rather pay or get paid every time you have sex?

42. Would you rather be a homewrecker or be home wrecked?

43. Would you rather never have to pee again or never have to shit again?

44. Would you rather see the texts your ex wrote about you or have them see the texts you sent about them?

45. Would you rather eat a whole jar of mayonnaise or a whole tub of butter?

46. Would you rather pee every time you stand up or poop every time you sit down?

47. Would you rather be a genius that nobody believes or an idiot that everybody believes?

48. Would you rather be eaten by maggots from the inside out or ants from the outside in?

49. Would you rather meet the love of your life knowing that they'll die in a year or never meet them?

50. Would you rather have the best house in a bad neighbourhood or the worst house in a fancy neighbourhood?

51. Would you rather be a member of the Kardashian family or a member of the Obama family?

52. Would you rather live in the white house or Buckingham palace?

53. Would you rather live without music or live without tv?

54. Would you rather have diarrhoea during your wedding ceremony or on your wedding night?

55. Would you rather live your life over as the opposite gender or start your life over as a kid again?

56. Would you rather have a 2-inch penis or man boobs?

57. Would you rather sit on a dick and eat cake (up your butt) or sit on a cake and eat a dick?

58. Would you rather pole dance naked for your parents or make out with them?

59. Would you rather lick a strangers condom or eat a handful maggots out of a dead corpse?

60. Would you rather die quickly or slowly but not painfully?

61. Would you rather paint a wall with your face or your knees?

62. Would you rather have a runny nose for the rest of your life or cough after every word?

63. Would you rather have your brain transplanted into a robot's body or an animal's body of your choice?

64. Would you rather sneeze all the time or have hiccups all the time?

65. Would you rather die by a zombie attack or a shark attack?

66. Would you rather always forget who you are or always forget who everyone else is?

67. Would you rather be completely sober your whole life or show up to your kids' graduation completely pissed?

68. Would you rather have to say all your sentences backwards or have to communicate through charades for a week?

69. Would you rather have a rewind button or a pause button in your life?

70. Would you rather fight 100 duck sized horses or one horse sized duck?

71. Would rather be able to speak to animals or every language in the world?