Festivals are a melting pot of mad creatures all coming together to bask in the sticky, burger-filled, plastic cup littered mecca of music celebration. People seemingly crawl from every corner of the country, cans of cider and inappropriate clothing close to hand. A day festival differs from a weekend one in that people aren't sleeping in shit encrusted tents every night, so they tend to have a little more spirit and sense of "going all out" for the day. Pacing goes out the window, along with common sense. You'll see all sorts of people at a day festival, so see how many of the below you can spot. Happy hunting!
1) The Underage Ones.
These are usually easy to spot, mainly because they won't be wearing many clothes. The boys feel the need to run around in 15 degree heat with their childlike, hairless torsos out and proud, while the girls tend to display as much flesh as is socially acceptable. You'll see them cowering at the edge of the beer tent, sizing up which old person they can persuade to buy them a pint on which they'll inevitably get hammered on for the next six hours.
2) The Middle-Aged Ones.
Spot these bad boys in their faded Metallica tour t-shirts from 2007, rocking out with their significant other half, loving life and hating the masses of children that surround them. They're here purely for the music, the rest can fuck on off.
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3) The Uber-Cool Parents.
These cool rents probably live in a loft converted apartment by the cool canal district, with their one year old "Finn." Finn is probably dressed in a striped babygro and a quirky hat, to match his parent's quirky style. They've brought Finn along, so that when he's 5, they can tell him he has already witnessed Haim live. It'll really add to his street cred.
4) The Very Drunk Ones.
Yes, pretty much everyone could be considered drunk at a day festival, because pretty much everyone drinks at a day festival. However, there is a delicate balance between drunk and very drunk. Drunk is dancing, laughing, having fun. Very drunk is sneaky naggins, vomming your ring up near the main stage and spending four hours in the medical tent. That and ruining everyone's day.
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5) The High Ones.
Find the high ones in the quirkiest corner of the festival. They'll be hanging out in the techno meets house meets "you're not hipster enough to be here" corner. They'll be fairly easy to spot on account of the chewing of the jaw, removing of their shoes to break into their secret stash, and the spaced-out look in their eyes. Gotcha!
6) The Couple.
There are two types of couples at a day festival. The ones who attend because they both love the line up and the ones who attend because their other half loves the line up. The ones who both love the line up will likely be dressed in a similar fashion, will probably be hammered and will probably be chowing down on one another's faces. The ones who are there out of love, will awkwardly stand beside their partner and pretend to enjoy awkward swaying along to lyrics that make zero sense to them whatsoever.
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7) The Fashionista.
Every girl at a festival thinks that she's going to stand out. She's got her floral head wreath, floaty kimino, too small, too short denim hotpants that reveal her arse cheeks, tanned legs, stickers on her forehead, knee high socks and fifteen thousand bracelets stacked upon her arms. She looks amazzzzzing though. She'll take roughly six hundred selfies over the space of seven hours, just in case you've got any doubts about that.
8) The Boys On Tour.
The lads are here to have the time of their wee lives. They've kitted themselves out in River Island's spring/summer collection. They've had a six pack in the house before they even left and now they're kick-starting on the pints inside. They'll spend the day gawking at the fine selection of semi-clad women wandering about the place, but will come to the realisation that they must be at the dribbling stage of drunk, in order to approach them. They'll push their way to the front of every act, despite not knowing who the fuck they're watching and will likely hit up a nightclub after it's all over. What LADS.
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9) The County Folk.
There's a bus load of them up from the depths of deepest Sligo. They've been knocking them back the whole way up and they're fairly on it right now. The lads are kitted out in the county colours, because according to Mammy, it's going to be a scorcher today. The girls are rocking some fine looking floral frocks. Wellies are the obvious choice of footwear. They don't know what to make of the mass crowds altogether. What looks like the equivalent of the entire population of Sligo Town, is congregating in front of the main stage, so they stick to watching from the safe recesses of the bar. At one stage Sean hops up on Paddy's shoulders and they all hoot about how "mad" they are. At 11pm sharp they hop back on board the pimp mobile and hotfoot it back to Schligo. The divils.
10) The Next Spielberg.
You know exactly who I'm talking about here. These are the ones who, instead of watching the gig like a normal person, insist on holding their phones a meter above everyone's head to record a fabulously shaky, screechy video that's unlikely to make it any further than their hard drive. The point of it all is to seemingly prove to everyone that they were in fact, there. Promise.
11) The Attention Seeker.
There's usually a scattering of these about the place. They'll be dressed in either a onesie, swimming gear, a mask, a hat bigger than the average car, a morph suit, a variety of neon shades or just fancy dress in general. They'll claim to be doing it for a bet, for the laugh or just because they want to, but the reality of the situation is that it's because they want to turn heads and feel special for one day and one day only. Shall we humour them? No.
