No matter how big or small your group is, I'm sure you'll recognize a few of these lads and easily put a face to the name. Some good, some better, some just pure wankers, but we love them all like brothers no matter what. Tag your mates and give them a number. Be careful though, #9 will definitely have something to say about it if you do. I salute you lads!
1) The Sporty One
- There's always one GAA/football man with exceptional skills on the field. The downside to this prick is that he never shuts up about the goal he scored last week or how he "smashed some cunt" the other day.
2) The Fat One
- Usually the funny man of the group. Everyone loves this cunt for some reason and he gets on with anyone he meets. You'll usually find him bustin' out his moves on the dance floor in a club or in the smoking area chatting to random groups of people you've never seen before.
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3) The Player/Lady's Man
- Instant hit with the lady's. Pull like an absolute train, although the lads will never admit it to his face. The fault in this chap is that sometimes he can lack in his 'ladness' and misses out on some unreal craic because, well, he's probably off pulling.
4) The One With the Girlfriend
- Sometimes there can be more than one. Beware lads, keep these fuckers to a minimum or you'll find your nights out filled with DMC's about girlfriends. No one wants to hear about your fucking relationship problems, so please, do fuck off!
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5) The Slow One
- This lad never gets any of the jokes and pretty much everything has to be explained to the fucking eejit. He can be a source of a few laughs when his full-on retardedness exceeds the limits of humanity and he becomes boarder line handicapped.
6) The Responsible One
- Can be handy in times when 'lads craic' goes a little too far and you find yourself in the back of a Garda car. Good at talking his way out of situations which is his most useful trait, especially when Garda are involved. Although, he can be a fucking down buzz a lot of the time coming out with shit like, "Jesus lads, I don't know about this" or "Maybe we should start looking for a taxi." It's times like these when they usually get a kick in the bollox if they continue with their 'old man talk'.
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7) The Quiet One
- Nobody really knows what's going on inside this creepy motherfucker's head. But nevertheless, he's one of the lads.
8) The Crazy One
- Often a clear line of tension between this lad and the Responsible One as their personalitiesobviously clash. When you think back on all of the fucked up nights out you've had, he's always there, right in the fucking middle of it, the cause of anything crazy you've ever done. He must be commended on his sheer ladness for having the craic.
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9) The Moaner
- Often times you find yourself wondering why you hang out with him. He's rarely up for the craic, and if he is, it's short lasted and not long before he's moaning about anything he can think of again. "the weather's fucking shite", "this is no craic", "I actually hate this club, why did we come here". I ACTUALLY HATE YOU, just fuck off you moany prick!
10) The Big Drinker/ Top Sessioner
- He's a machine. Unstoppable when on the cans and never gives up. Even when he's half asleep between two green bins he'll still have can in his hand. Always the last awake at an after-session, simply enjoying his 22nd can while everyone else has KOed 4 hours ago. Well deserved of his name.
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11) The Smart One
- This lad can be an absolute nerd who just loves his study or is simply just a smart fucker. Nevertheless, he's always nailing those First Class Honours or A1's, while the rest of the boys struggle to pass. We hate, envy and respect you all at the same time you wanker.
12) The Floater
- Good banter, when he's around that is. We all have that one mate that fucks off for a period of weeks at a time. Some think he leads a double life. Other's see him as a hibernating squirrel who sleeps for weeks on end. Either way, no one knows where he is half of the time, but when he eventually does show no one questions where he's been and just carries on as if he's never left.
13) The Stoner
- For some reason, unknown to the rest of us, he absolutely loves his hash, grass, whatever he can get his hands on. Usually very generous if any of the lads fancy a few pulls on the spliff once in a while. Very popular at an afters-session, I don't have to explain why..
