Results. The one word that has the ability to put the absolute fear of god into the most sane of people. We've all been there, paper in hand, lump in throat, thoughts going ninety, emotions pumping through our veins. Don't feel alone, we've all felt the same. Seeing as exam results season is imminent, here are emotions that everyone goes through before receiving results. You're not alone...
1) Denial
Oh sweet, sweet denial. Ever since you left that exam hall, you've been pretending that said exam did not happen. Any mere mention of finding out your fate, results in you screaming "NO, SHUT UP, IT NEVER HAPPENED." You're so damn convincing, you've actually almost convinced yourself too. Nice one.
2) Fear
You've now come to terms, secretly mind you, with the fact that yes, you did sit an exam and yes, you're going to receive results at some stage or another. This is where the fear emotion sets in. Pure, unadulterated, blood freezing fear. Think of it like this, you're actually afraid of a piece of paper. That's right. Paper.
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3) Panic
The closer the time comes, the more the panic aspect comes into play. Approximately seven million bad thoughts are rushing through your brain during this stage. Especially at night time. No sleep for you, my friend.
4) Regret
Why god, why didn't I sit with my face glued to the books for the past six months? Whyyyyyy did I not care more? Why did someone not sit on me to ensure I obtained as much information as was totally necessary? REGRETFUL FACE.
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5) Anger
This is an extension of regret, in that you're filled with remorse for the hours of study that you instead filled with hours of binge eating and reality television analysis. WHY AM I SO GOD DAMN STUPID? Just blame those in your life whom you feel should have single handedly forced you to study. Bastards.
6) Remorse
Now, you feel, is the time to do the rounds and inform every sorry person that actually has faith in you, that no, you will not be succeeding in life. Replace those plus signs with minuses and above all, lower, lower, lower those expectations.
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7) False Hope
Perhaps it's because you've been listening to those who believe that really, you're not a complete simpleton, but somehow, from some deep, dark recess, you start to think that maybe, maybe things aren't quite as bad as you'd first led yourself to believe. Maybe.
8) Confidence
Now that things in your tiny mind aren't quite as horrifying as you'd initally thought, you begin to think that somehow, you may have achieved the impossible. You may have really outdone yourself this time. You'll get amazzzzzzzing results. You're going to get a prize for the best results ever achieved, through putting in the least amount of work ever. WINNING.
9) Acceptance
Following a swift stint at a false sense of confident, misleading hope, you're right back to the reality of the situation. This is the acceptance stage. Acceptance that yes, you firmly you are likely to have failed at life, will probably let down everyone around you, not least yourself and will now have to face a lengthily stint at repeats, but that it's all ok. Because, after all, life success is about much more than a piece of paper. You've accepted your fate. Now go forth and receive that paper. You emotion filled beast you.
