Lately, the coolest thing to be is awkward. The latest trend is having anxiety. "Ugh, I'm just so awkward!", "My social anxiety can't deal with this!". It's great that mental health talk has been normalised (because it is normal) but misusing the words is a no-no, "I'm so depressed today," not okay. Sadly, anxiety has become so much more common these days. I'm here to tell you the truth about having anxiety. The dirty details about what it's like to suffer from it and how it's not fun or cute.
Would you like to break out into a cold sweat when it's coming up to your name on the school roll? When your palms get sweaty and it beads on your forehead and you're trying to dab it away without it being obvious. Or would you like to have one of your close friends say, "God! Would you stop moving?" when you can't stay still, fidgeting and bouncing your knee because you're too nervous about asking a question in Maths.
Being in a line to order food you count your money over and over and try to take deep breaths to stop your hands from shaking. The woman on the counter could be the nicest person in the world, but to you she's going to judge you for stuttering and you're just wasting her time. But then when you order it's like you can't speak because your mouth goes all dry. Sometimes it feels like you're going to have a heart attack from the palpitations you have. All these things are so cool and attractive to have, aren't they?
Not being able to sleep because you have to do a presentation the next day is so cute. And throwing up with nerves is just adorable.
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Anxiety can be so bad that it stops a person from leaving their own house. The only place they feel comfortable is their home because it's reliable and won't change. Outside there's so many variables and things that could change your plans. Because with anxiety, you think over and over again about what you're doing, like getting on the bus. You count your fair at least 5 times and say in your mind the amount so you know it'll come out right.
The constant self-doubt, worry and unease an anxiety sufferer can feel can make them sad; make them so sad that they can become depressed. They see no end to their worrying and are too scared to try new things. They feel helpless. The amount of thoughts flying through their minds of all the possible outcomes of any situation can leave them exhausted and emotionally spent. They become isolated because they fear outside, which can cause depression and they see no end to that. Sound cool now?
Anxiety is hard on the sufferer but it's just as hard on the people around them. People with anxiety constantly doubt themselves; they need regular reassurance. It's easy for their friends and family to get frustrated with them because they feel like they always need attention and they're not being logical. People with anxiety know that they have unnecessary fears, which others view as 'stupid,' but as hard as they try, it can be difficult to get out of their own heads.
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If someone you know is struggling with anxiety, here's how you can help. Be the "confident friend," anxiety sufferers need someone they can rely on to order their food, help them shopping, all that kind of stuff. Let them know for sure that they can talk to you about it, without any judgement, as they'd be voicing the same fear, over and over again. Let them know that they can call you whenever they need to; having someone there that understands and sympathises with you is so important. But try and avoid the "I told you so" tone.
If you have friends or family with anxiety it can be easy to become anxious yourself. Make sure you're taking care of yourself and your own stress and anxiety.
If you need anymore advice and information on anxiety and mental illness visit Aware.
