There are a whole variety of things responsible for leading you to dump someone. Too clingy, very loud, being a cheat. If someone's not right for you, you just know. For every perfectly feasible reason out there that you could possible have for dumping someone however, are thousands of shitty reasons. Read on and get some inspiration for yourself. Just don't say I told you.
1) You're Not Ready For A Relationship Despite Being 23 Years Of Age
You dear sir or madam, you need to grow the fuck up. Stat.
2) They Consider KFC To Be A Delicacy
Some people say the same about snails. Nobody will win this war.
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3) They Drink Blue WKD
Have you been going out with a 13 year old?
4) You Think You'll Get Way Better
With an ego as large as yours, you should be so lucky.
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5) There's A Justin Bieber Album On Their IPod
Actually, this is a pretty valid reason to dump them. What the hell were you thinking?
6) They Live More Than 15 Minutes Away
Lazy. This is not 1764. We have cars and stuff now.
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7) Their Clothes Are Shit
Instead of dumping them like the massive dickhead that you oh so clearly are, why not take them shopping, suggest a wardrobe overhaul or failing all of that, just burn their stuff and act innocent?
8) You Have A Sneaking Suspicion That Their Sister Is A Bitch
So what if she is. You don't have to go out with her, after all. Even if she is a bitch.
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9) They Don't Pay For Absolutely Everything
How shocking, this must be the 50's after all.
10) All Of Your Friends Are Single
So if Paddy jumped off the bridge...
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11) They Play Too Many Sports
Yes being fit, toned and healthy is a massive no no. You're dead right on that one.
12) They Haven't Watched Breaking Bad
They have clearly been living under a rock for the past year. Forgive them these sins.
13) They Only Make You Laugh 15 Times A Day
Oh I wasn't aware that I was talking to a professional comedian here, congratulations. Perhaps pick a clown for your next relationship. That's bound to keep you laughing.