It happens to the best of relationships. One day everything is perfect and you're both happy, the next you're still happy, but you feel like their head is somewhere else. It might be all in your head because you don't see them 24/7. However, if you feel like something is up, something might be up. You can't stop asking yourself 'is it over'? All that you can do is talk to them about it or repress repress repress. Here are some signs that your girl/boyfriend has lost interest in your relationship and is slipping away:
1) Not Into Your Bedroom Antics
There's been a change in your sex-life. They never initiate sex and whenever you do, they either hesitate or are too tired or not into it. They have even cut back on their PDAs, hand holding and kissing in public. You feel like you've become glorified friends with benefits, except you lack the benefits.
2) They Won't Make Future Plans
Maybe you've brought up the possibility of going away on holiday this summer and they shot you down. Or maybe there's an event coming up in a couple of months and they wouldn't say yes or no to you, just 'we'll see'. If your girl/boyfriend will never agree to go to something with you in the future, chances are they don't picture you in their future.
3) Picks Fights & Very Defensive
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Are they constantly picking fights with you, bringing up stuff from months ago without any reason? It could be that they are trying to legitimize their loss of feelings for you because you weren't the best partner, which you might well have been, but no one likes being the villain. They might be feeling guilty that they don't love you anymore and are hiding those feelings behind anger and being short with you.
4) Change in Communication
Did you talk to each other every day before? Or a least send a poke on Facebook? If they are slacking off in the communication department, it could be that you're not on their mind as much as you used to be. This is frustrating, especially if you see that they are online but haven't read your message or they take ages writing back to you.
5) They Are Always Too Busy
They are never free to hang out with you, or they are but they make it seem like it would be such a trek for them to come over to you - even if you live three doors away from each other. You shouldn't have to plead with your girl/boyfriend to hang out with you. It might be that they have lost interest and the thought of hanging out with you isn't as fun as it once was.
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6) A Third Party Has Emerged
Has your girl/boyfriend made a new friend who you think is getting a bit too friendly? Does your girl/boyfriend bring them up all the time? 'So-and-so said the funniest thing,' 'Listen to this music, So-and-so recommended it.' It can be hurtful to recognise that your girl/boyfriend has a crush on someone else, you remember what it was like when they felt that way about you. This is especially prevalent in long-distance relationships, you're not there to see for yourself. If you're anyway insecure, you'll just fear the worst which will spell the end of your relationship.
7) You Want Different Things From Life
Are they are set to settle down as soon as college is finished, but you want to go off and travel the world? That's not the best omen for a relationship. You have to be on the same page and want the same things from life. If you don't want the same things, that will cause both of you to lose interest, and start looking for someone who has more life goals in common with you.
8) They Suggest An Open Relationship
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Often this is a last ditch effort to save a dying relationship. It's basically your girl/boyfriend asking for permission to sleep around while still being attached to you. They probably suggested it because although they are interested in seeing what else is out there, they're terrified of being alone and being without you. So they are asking you to be their safety net, their backup if they don't find anyone better out there. Nothing says 'I'm not that into you' like telling your girl/boyfriend that you want to sleep with other people.
9) They've Stopped Putting In An Effort
I'm not saying that if they aren't dolled up to the nines every time you agree to hang out, that they are definitely not interested anymore. Say you haven't seen each other in a while and when they come to see you, they didn't bother showering and are wearing sweatpants that have visible stains from last night's dinner on them. Are they sending out not-so-subtle signs that they aren't bothered to look nice for you because they aren't that into you anymore? Or maybe that they've started taking you for granted?
10) They Don't Ask About Your Day
You ask them how their day was, how they are, what they were up to since you last spoke, but they never ask you back. Even the silences on the phone feel like they are literally swallowing up your connection. You might even ask them to ask you, or just tell them anyway but can't shake that nagging feeling that they just aren't that interested in your day at all.
11) You Just Know
Something is wrong and you just know it. They aren't tired, or sick, or stressed about work or college. There's something lacking in the way they talk to you, hold your hand or indeed, avoid holding your hand. You can feel them slipping away, but you can't hold onto them, you can't make someone love you if they don't feel it anymore. Either they are going to break up with you or you can beat them to the bullet. Before you do anything rash, however, try talking to them first before you do something that you both might regret.
