Just because you want to be in a relationship, that doesn't mean that you should be in one. You don't need to have a big epic love romance in college. In fact, this is the perfect time to figure yourself out, your likes and dislikes. Being single allows you to experiment and mingle. If you have been dating and want to take it to the 'next level' think about whether it's something you actually want. If you're not dating and all you can think about is finding the love of your life, the how's about you calm the fuck down. You have loads of time to find love, don't let it completely control your life. Have some fun friend. Here are some signs you're not ready for a relationship;
1) Feel You Need Someone To Make You Happy
If you're not comfortable being by yourself, then how do you expect someone else to be comfortable with you? You are your selling point in a relationship. If you can't bring yourself to attend events without a date, that's sad. You're your own obstacle to your happiness. You shouldn't wait around for Mr. Perfect to come along and make you happy.
2) Spend More Time Looking For Love Than Having Fun
If you spend more time swiping right on Tinder than hanging out with your friends - or swipe while with your friends - then no way will you find Mr. Perfect. Tinder is great for meeting someone for casual, drunken sex. I absolutely see the appeal. However, your love life shouldn't be your entire life. If it is, then you're not going to be that interesting to whoever you're hoping to date/dating. Passions and interests are important, attractive features. The best way to find someone who might be the right fit for you, is to pursue your own interests. If you're into writing, why not head down to a Writer's Society meeting, or if you're into working out, then head down to the gym. Don't turn everything into a hunt for a life partner. Calm down and have fun. You don't want to seem desperate.
3) Need Someone To Complete You
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Sounds romantic in Hollywood films right? However, it's kind of sad in reality. Wouldn't it be nicer to find someone who complements you? Someone who brings out the best in you and who you, in turn, bring out the best in. You're already a complete person. You don't need someone to fill out the rest of your personality, you're already complete.
4) You Want To Save Them
A lot of girls have a sort of 'saviour complex', they see potential boyfriends as projects for them to change or fix. Frankly, that's insulting to the guys. You are not their therapist or their mother. It's up to them to sort themselves out. All you can do is be there for them. If all you want is a project, then what you're really craving is drama and dysfunction in your life. Contrary to popular belief, you can't change someone. If they're a dick now, they're going to stay that way. If they're interested in something that you completely detest, you can't get rid of that interest. You either accept who they are, or find someone else who suits you better.
5) You Want To Be Saved
If you're constantly telling yourself things like "I'm such a mess" or "why am I so insecure sometimes?" then you need to sort yourself out before you invite someone else into your life. Otherwise, you'll probably attract a guy who has a 'saviour complex' (see 4) or you'll end up with someone who has the same issues. Misery loves company and so if you hang out with miserable people, you'll end up doubling your misery. Be your own dashing knight and save yourself, instead of waiting for someone to come and save you.
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6) You're Being Drawn To The Wrong Person
The guys you're constantly attracted to are already taken, absolute dickheads or are gay. If you like someone who already has a girlfriend, you shouldn't try to make them choose between the two of you. It's not an epic love story. There are people out there that are more suitable and available to you. If they're gay, you can't make them attracted to you. You are not their type. And as I said above, you can't change people, keep away from the dickheads.
7) Haven't Dealt With Baggage From A Previous Relationship
If you've just got out of a messy relationship, chances are you're not ready to jump right back into something new. You need time to get over that person. Chances are you're more ready for a rebound than a relationship. Another person isn't going to make you instantly forget about your ex. However, every relationship is different. You could find someone who is a great match for you. Don't believe that the first guy to show an interest in you after your break up will be that guy.
8) Feel That You Can't Be Your Authentic Self
If you're bending your interests and how you present yourself as a means of attracting that guy you like, what's the point? You're going to have to keep up that act if you do end up together. Wouldn't you rather be who you are, like what you like? Shouldn't you be more concerned about whether or not that person is the right fit for you? Relationships involve two people. Start seeing it that way and you'll probably find someone who likes weird little you, for you.
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