Sh*t Only People Who Work In Call Centres Will Understand

For big companies, call centres are the best way of keeping in touch with their customers, as well as obtaining new ones. What this means though is that people have to work in these centres, and be the measured and professional voice of the company. However, this is easier said than done. Here is some of the shit you have to deal with if you work in a call centre.

 

You Start Dealing With Personal Calls Like The Ones In Work

You know you've been working in a call centre too long when your Mammy rings you and you start talking to her as if she's a customer of the company you work for, when all she's talking about is what's for dinner that evening.

 

Being Personally Blamed For The Company's Policy/Decision/Prices

Some people seem to think that the guys on the other end of the phone are personally responsible for the decisions and policies of the company that they might have issues with. Some people appear to be of the opinion that if they are unhappy with the price of something, that you have just pulled the number out of thin air, and made it really high just to annoy them.

 

Trying (And Failing) To Understand Different Accents

Some accents are hard to understand at the best of times. But add to it a patchy phone connection, and things become infinitely more difficult. You end up just guessing what they're saying and hoping that your replies make sense.

 

You Can Only Ask So Many Times How Someone Spells Their Name

An unspoken rule of life is that if you don't quite hear what someone has said, the most amount of times you can ask them to repeat it is three. After that, just like the person with the tricky accent, you have to just guess what they said and hope it works out. Unusual names, and the aforementioned accent/bad connection combination are to blame for this.

 

Working Out The Gender Of  The Person Is Sometimes Harder Than It Sounds

Especially if the person has a gender-neutral name, like Charlie or Jamie, for example. It isn't that big a deal considering that they're going to be treated the same regardless, but it's not exactly ideal if a bill is sent to them and the title in the address is Mr. instead of Ms.

 

You Can Recite Your Script Faster Than You Can Say Your Own Name

And it ends up infiltrating your dreams and every other part of your daily life. It's like having a really annoying song stuck in your head for the whole day, only a thousand times worse.

 

A Lot Of People Out There Have Hilarious Email Addresses

One thing that is hard to work is that even though it only takes 5 minutes to create a new email address, some people insist on keeping the hilarious one they made when they were younger, and some which are just downright weird. Something along the lines of [email protected].

 

Some People Customers Call In Just To Talk

One of the sadder realisations of working in a call centre is that some people are so lonely that they will just ring the number on the bill just to talk to someone. And the even worse thing is that you have to be abrupt with these people because of all the work you have to do.

 

Angry People Are The Worst Kind Of People

You aren't paid nearly enough for the amount of abuse you have to put up with in this job, and some people really can be quite mean when they want to be.

 

Trying To Stay Professional Is The Hardest Part Of The Job

Sometimes people deserved to be yelled at, or call stupid, or whatever the appropriate response is for them being an ass. Unfortunately, you have to stay professional at all times, and as a result, the rage has to just build up inside you until one day you go on a rampage, seeking out the customers who have wronged you in the past and beating them with a big stick. Okay this probably won't happen, but imagine how satisfying it would be.

 

The Hang Up Button Is Your Best Friend

The best way to deal with any of the abusive people. Although I have heard of call centres where there is no hang up button because they're an emergency line for a company. I really pity the people who work there.

 

You End Up Eating Cake Nearly Every Day

Whether someone is leaving, it's someone's birthday, someone just got engaged or married, or maybe somebody just got a new cat. So many people work in the office that there is always some reason to celebrate, and that means cake. Lots and lots of cake.

 

Targets Can Go Suck A Big One...

Always much harder to reach than you think, and you're mood depends on them a little more than you'd like to admit.

 

...And The Same Goes For Call Evaluations

For those who haven't worked in call centres before, this is the main reason for the call being "recorded for training purposes". And what a load of shit this reason is. I know they're necessary to keep the standards of the centre up, but when you fail for the smallest of reasons, you struggle to be reasonable.

 

Sales People Know How To Party

The saving grace of every call centre is the nights out. I don't whether it has anything to do with the kind of job it is and the stresses it brings, but when sales people decide to party, they go all out.