The Little White Lies Essential In Any Relationship

A relationship is built purely upon trust. Trust and a healthy amount of cursing. Of course, without honesty and trust a relationship will crumble, but that said, a few polite, well placed white fibs are key from time to time. In fact, they spare many's a fight from erupting, many more feelings from being hurt, many more insults from being thrown about the place. Here are the little white lies essential in every relationship.

 1) "No, you do not look fat in that."

We're not thinking that you look fat as such, more that there are most definitely things in your wardrobe that are far more flattering. However, if we so much as suggest this, we may as well say goodbye to our favourite body part.

2) "What's my type? You, of course."

Actually, my type is a combination of Ryan Gosling and Colin Farrell but I love you anyway. Honest.

3) "No, I don't fancy any of your friends."

Apart from the three hot ones. I turn to jelly a little at the mere sight of those babes.

4) "Of course I'd prefer a night in over a lads night out."

Of course there's nothing I'd prefer more than to drink beer and talk about football all night, but it's really not worth you nagging me over.

5) "Of course I'd prefer a night in over a girls night."

Of course there's nothing I'd rather do than spend five hours getting ready, followed by six hours of gossiping, bitching and laughing but it's not worth the sulking you're inevitably going to do if I go.

6) "Yes I totally remembered our Anniversary."

Yes, Facebook did remind me that today is our Anniversary.

7) "I did notice your new hairstyle."

The only time I'd notice a change in your hair, is if you chopped it into a bowl cut and dyed it blue.

8) "You're the best sex I've ever had."

Apart from that one night with a sexy stranger in Spain.....

9) "It's that time of the month."

I really don't feel like having sex tonight, therefore I'm going to lie and blame my unsuspecting ovaries. Try arguing with that.

10) "You look just as pretty without make-up."

Clearly you don't look just as good without make-up. Why else would you wear it on a very regular basis?

11) "My parents love you."

My parents tolerate you, they're never going to love someone who has sex with their child.

12) "I'm totally cool with you having friends of the opposite sex."

I want to be cool with it all. It's just that all of your opposite sex friends are hot, intimidating and just generally, I hate them.

13) "Size isn't everything."

Yes it is. I mean, knowing what to do with it is far more important and all, but if yours is fun sized then there isn't really that much you CAN do with it. Soz.